Walking in a Winter… Wonderland? Hmmm…

Wisconsin Weather

Sadly… this forecast is our reality: http://www.weather.com/weather/alerts/localalerts/54904?phenomena=WC&significance=Y&areaid=WIZ048&office=KGRB&etn=0005

Therefore, read the list below for a bit of a laugh…

65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Wisconsin sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won’t start.
People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.

40  above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York city landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 above Zero:
People in Miami are convinced the world is over.
People in Wisconsin close the windows.

Zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Wisconsin get out their winter coats.

10 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.

20 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
People in Wisconsin get upset because they can’t start their snow-mobiles.

40 below zero:
ALL atomic motion stops.
People in Wisconsin start saying…’cold enough fer ya?’

50 below zero:
Hell freezes over.
Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late.

Blessings! Stay warm!

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40°F Temperature Drop in One Day!!!

Warm up with a cozy mystery http://amzn.com/B00APPXD90!

Coming off of my free promotion blitz for my ebook, all I have to say is “Thank you!” On the Amazon Free ebook sales rankings, my book hit #2 in my genre and #76 in overall fiction! Quite a feat for a newbie with only two little reviews. (By the way, if anyone is interested in reading it just to me a review, please let me know)

While the Wisconsin weather (and surrounding states, too) has been an uncontrollable “bucking Bronco”, we need to prepare for anything. It was 50°F at about noon yesterday. This morning? It is snowing with school delays and a projected 5-7 inches of snow by this afternoon. Ah! Good times.

Then, we get a deep freeze again. So, that’s happening.

I do hope this helps the ice fishing, though. Quite a few ice fisherman have been taking unnecessary risks on too-thin ice… Falling though ice is a very bad idea. Don’t risk it!

Drive safely everyone!

Blessings!  Read below for an excerpt of Murder in Death’s Door County, a mystery with a bit of romance:

Between my throbbing head and being super distracted, I totally missed the car braking in front of me. Until I was about one foot away from it. As my heart flew to my throat, I simultaneously prayed and slammed on the brakes. I only started breathing again when I didn’t hear the “crunch” of metal. I heard what sounded more like an aggressive scraping. I slapped my forehead. Darn it all! Not another accident! Granted, this seemed like just a fender-bender, but still…

I resigned myself to the inevitable as I opened the car door to exchange insurance information. As I pushed open the door, I encountered resistance and felt a thud. Then, I heard a howl of pain and a muffled, “Ah you tayin to kiw me?”

Startled, I leapt out of the car and looked down to see a man. In great pain. Writhing on the ground and holding his nose.

Immediately, I bent down over him, “Are you okay?” Oh dear! Oh dear! This isn’t good! That makes two accidents in as many months. Just last month, I had t-boned a deputy sheriff’s car. I still got teased about that.

“Wha ah you doig? Why did you opah ya dooh? I thing you brog mah noze! Aargh!”

I decided that the best defense is a strong offense. “Well, what do you think you were doing, sneaking up to my door! I was just about to get out of the car and assess the damage! Obviously, I didn’t see you there! Do you think if I had seen you there I would have opened the door like that? Do you? Do you?”

By the time I had finished my tirade, he was vertical and staring at me as though I’d grown a second head.

The first thing I noticed about him was the gash across his nose and the profuse bleeding. The next thing I noticed was the scowl his mouth made. The last thing I noticed was that his piercing green eyes made me feel flush. Mentally, I admonished myself. A cute guy finally crosses my path and what do I do? Crash into his car and break his nose. Well, possibly break his nose. I wasn’t a doctor and couldn’t make a diagnosis. However, his nose was really bleeding a lot.

He kept glaring at me as he held his nose together. Silently, he handed me a business card and turned on his heel. Speechless, I stared after him.

Beat the Winter Blahs!

Hi! I’m excited to be offering my mystery novel (“Murder in Death’s Door County”) for free on Amazon, for the next few days! The promotion will run from Friday to Tuesday (1/25-1/29). I hope you enjoy!

Here’s the link: http://amzn.com/B00APPXD90

AND, here’s a brief excerpt of my book:

“Hello? Harry?” I called out tentatively, as I entered the room with my eyes closed. I had two motives: I didn’t want to see him in his skivvies and I really didn’t want to startle him. Stepping inside Harry’s room, I noticed how much it resembled an attic room and even had a gable window. With a window seat upholstered in striped shades of blue. Swallowing down my envy over the pretty room, my eyes swept the rest of the room. The southern-facing windows really brightened the room, bathing everything in warmth and sunniness (which did nothing to decrease my envy). Harry had lucked out view-wise, too. Since his room was on the third floor, he could see over the treetops to the shores of Lake Michigan, which was only a block from the inn. I noted Harry’s watch on the nightstand, next to his reading glasses. He had his luggage arranged neatly in the corner and, presumably, today’s outfit laid across an overstuffed chintz chair. Upon closer review, I espied the corner of an envelope sticking out of his suit jacket and wondered if that was my bonus check. Quickly, I strode across the room with the intention of…

“Miss! What are you doing?”

Crap. A maid would have to appear now. With a guilty start, I turned around to face one of Kitty’s staff.

“I’m sorry, were you talking to me?”

“I don’t see anyone else here, do I?”

I couldn’t even fathom going through the whole story with her, so I made something up. I needed something to tell her, fast. Something that would justify being in Harry’s room, without him.

“Oh, well, I’m just waiting for my lover, Harry.” Lover? Oh my goodness, what had possessed me?

“Your lover?”

“Yes, yes, exactly. My lover. Harry and I became involved in a purely physical relationship the last time I went to Chicago and he visited me this weekend.” Pleased with myself, I smiled in smug satisfaction.

“Hmmm… then you’d better tell that blonde who visited his room last night that you are his lover,” the maid shot back, putting an icky emphasis on “lover.”

Reading her name tag, I cleared my throat nervously, “We have an open relationship. Anyway, what do you want, Millicent? Can I help you?”

Millicent eyed me suspiciously, “No, no. I was just getting a leg up on cleaning the rooms.”

I felt a pang of guilt. Cleaning the whole inn and without the benefit of an elevator must be difficult. Millicent’s untidy grey hair and imposing manner made her seem older than I thought, but the job would even be tough for a younger woman. Maybe that’s why Millicent was so bitter and cranky. I vowed to cut her some slack.

I said, with a forced lightness, “Then you should probably get started. I’m sure Kitty’s wondering where you are. I guess I’ll go then, too. Harry must have gone to breakfast without me. That scamp!”

At the doorway, Millicent and I parted ways. Waiting until Millicent turned the corner, I scuttled back into the room and again, tried to snag that envelope. But something distracted me and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a puddle of reddish brown water on the bathroom floor. Reddish brown water? Determined to investigate, I walked across the room. With a sinking feeling, I called, “Harry? Hello? Are you in here?”

No answer. Tentatively, I entered the bathroom and saw the source of the puddle. Watery blood was running out of the bathtub and onto the floor…

Stay Tuned!

Stay posted to this site for a little announcement regarding my mystery ebook… until that happens, please enjoy this Jim Gaffigan riff on Bowling… 😀

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5fm7QPA9zY

So, grab a cup of hot chocolate (seriously, it is still really cold outside!) and have a little laugh. And check back later today for the announcement.

Blessings!

Highbrow Poetry Hour (not so much ;) )

I get this 
poem every winter & every winter I love re-reading it.
It’s a beautiful poem and very well 
written.

A poem by 
Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre
mime-attachment
SHIT
ITS COLD
The End.

On the Upswing…

So, it is definitely winter in Wisconsin. We are in the middle of a horrid cold snap. Brrrr… the temperature this morning is roughly -9°F, and about -25 with the wind chill. Yesterday, when I left my day job, my car was not happy. And the cold made my gas pedal very stiff. Not fun for someone who likes to drive fairly fast.

My sweetie usually parks in the garage (I have a bit of a fear of parking in garages since I hit one once and caused $2,000 in damage), but last night he let me… fingers crossed that my car starts today. Gotta go make some money to pay for an advertising campaign for my humble little cozy mystery.

Speaking of which, expect an announcement for a Kindle promotion soon! With that I will leave you with two good thoughts and a picture:

1. Temperatures will be in the 30s by the end of this week.

2. We gain about half an hour of sunlight by the end of this month!

Oh, and remember this weather?

IMG_1483

Blessings!

Winter in Door County

I set my cozy mystery in Door County because I really just love that area of my beloved state. With its abundant trees, great shorelines, and fantastic sunsets, it boasts a lot of natural beauty. And the people who live up there are friendly and kind, plus they are very careful in allowing which businesses can settle up there. As a result, when you go to Door County, you can really “get away”.

In summer, it means you get away with a lot of other people. Which can be a lot of fun. There is always something to see and do. However, winter presents a different set of options, including the bonus that you pretty much get the whole place to yourself.

As Brian Clark writes in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, winter brings a whole host of things to do:  http://www.jsonline.com/features/travel/winter-in-door-county-offers-solitude-quiet-7s7pi18-181595341.html

If you are able to get away and head to Door County this winter, be sure to dress warmly. And enjoy one the sunsets, which are available year-round!

IMG_1465

Blessings!